Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Complaints of the Day

Anyone who has ever interacted with me knows that I am a master complainer. While most people keep their thoughts to themselves, I just have a knack for voicing all of my complaints to anyone within earshot. This has driven a few people mad in the past, but it seems to work for me. Voicing my complaints makes me feel better.

So, I figured voicing them on my blog will make me feel doubly better...after all, two mediums are better than one. Without further ado, behold my complaint-making skillz. Oh, and PS... I may even make this a weekly thing, so enjoy!

Complaint #1: I hate traffic. I know, nobody actually likes traffic, but enjoy thinking that I hate it more than the average person. I have waged a war with it for many many years, my most formidable enemy being a little road I like to call I-66... also fondly known as the Interstate OF INSANITY (insert evil laugh here). I am also often up against two other worthy foes...Route 50 and the Interstate of Insanity's little brother, I-4 the love of God please let me pass out-95.

For the longest time, I attempted to avoid my enemies. I searched in vain for back roads. But I still found myself bumper to bumper with my nemesis every day. Then, finally, it looked like I had won the war. I moved so close to work that I was able to avoid these roads altogether. I would laugh in glee as I cruised down Wilson Blvd., which is quite a smooth little ride compared to its ugly cousins. That joy ride lasted for an entire year...365 days of almost traffic-free commutes.

But now, I have moved to a far away land...outside of... the beltway. Oh, the horror! And my enemies are rearing their ugly heads again. Yesterday, I deided to try out my old foe, I-66. I lost miserably and spent an hour on the road screaming in terror. Today, I heard about an accident on 66, so I hopped on Rt. 50, thinking I would outsmart the unmerciful traffic. Shocked was I to find that the traffic had outsmarted me... with an accident on 50 as well! It was little consolation that I arrived at work in just 54 minutes. I mean, wow, I had shaved a whole 6 minutes off my commute! I felt like vomiting.

So, until I find a way to avoid these roads, these very banes of my existence, I resign myself to suffering. With map in hand, I will attempt to prosper, my eagle eyes searching for that one small road that may lead me to salvation. But mark my words, readers. Before I move away and escape this hellish excuse for a transportation network, I will find a way to beat it.

The traffic can take the few hours we have to enjoy ourselves after work, but it will never take our FREEDOM!

Okay, I had more complaints, but that one wore me out. It's too sensitive of a subject. I need to rest and let my heart stop racing. Deep breaths, deep breaths.

1 Comments:

At 8:06 PM, Blogger T-cita said...

L - I have a complaint! You need to post more!! :) Heart, T

 

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