A Sleepy Girl's Thoughts on Life

Old-Fashioned Romance

I've always considered myself a bit of a romantic. I like romantic gestures...but I'm usually not the one making these gestures. I have an old-fashioned view of romance, I guess, because I feel that flowers and candle lit dinners are best left up to the guy. However, I've come to find out that most guys are not romantic in this way. And why should they be? They are men and they do not have the same inclinations as us women...we're always planning and scheming to please our partners, while they are thinking about what type of beer they want to drink, or when they'll next get to have sex.

I know this seems like a cynical view, but I've accepted the fact that men are simply a different animal. They think differently and we can't force them to think our way. But what we can do, as I realized yesterday, is create our own romance. So, yesterday, I returned from work at about 5:15 (early even for me), and realized I had almost two hours until K returned from exercising. I was absolutely famished, so I began making dinner. My simple pasta dish turned into three dishes as a scheme began cooking in my head...why not make an amazing meal? I had time, I had ingredients, and I almost never cook, making this all the more special.

After about an hour, I had cleaned up the kitchen and main room, laid out the table with candles and wine glasses, and had two pots (squash tortellini and teriyaki vegetables) bubbling on the stove. For the first course, I made a fresh batch of guacamole with chopped tomatoes. With the cooking under control, I decided to concentrate on more important matters...my look. I put on the sexiest thing I could think of (though I'm not going to mention it here) and my high strappy shoes. I also french-braided my hair, just how K likes it.

For the finishing touches, I took out the bottle of chilled peach chardonnay I had placed in the freezer, poured the wine, lit the candles, dimmed the lights, and tuned the radio to a soft jazz station. It was perfect. And you know what? It was liberating. I felt so in control, so capable, so wonderfully attractive. Please note that I don't usually feel "wonderfully attractive"...but prancing around in my little outfit and heeled shoes made me feel...sexy. Yes, sexy. It felt good to do this for K, but it felt just as good (in a different way) to do it for myself.

So, I'll skip the rest of the night, but he came home and loved it, obviously. He was very surprised and happy. There's nothing like a little bit of old-fashioned romance to jump-start a relationship. And even though I wish every night could be as magical as that was, that's not how life is. It is difficult to escape our mundane routines, and even more difficult to know that we need an escape. And if I have to be the one to initiate an escape, then so be it. But, as I told K, this is not and should not be just a woman's job. Men have romantic genes in them somewhere. Romance doesn't have to be a big production, either. It can be as simple as candles in the bedroom and a flower on the pillow. I wish everyone a little bit of romance in their life!

posted by Sleepy Girl @ 1:21 PM