Friday, September 09, 2005

Mechanical bulls and other musings

New post! I know, you're shocked...and I deeply apologize for my blogging haitus. I've just had one stressful thing after another lately, and now I finally have a moment of peace to write. Let's recap...

First, I had my school orientation. This went very well, despite my anxiety. I bought my books, got my ID card, actually made friends with someone, and got to get up in front of my fellow new grad students and demonstrate how to row on a plastic chair. Don't ask. But it was kind of fun and enabled everyone to get to know who I was. Plus, I got a free t-shirt.

The morning after orientation, I left for the brown pastures of Texas. After being moved from the prostitute-riddled Clarion Hotel to the posh Renaissance, the trip was quite pleasant (and no I am not kidding about the prostitutes). I worked hard, but not overly hard, and had lots of great meals, in addition to many many fuzzy navels. It felt good to let loose for a few days, tiring as that was. I stayed up late every night and got up early every morning, which is quite a departure from my normal life (in which I stay up late but not too late and get up late but not too late). Oh, and I rode a mechanical bull. Three times. With a record time of 7 seconds. After having about six+ glasses of wine. Go me. And I learned foozball, which was quite fun until I spilled my wine all over the table. Don't even try to act surprised.

Now, on to more mature things. I started school the same day I flew back from TX, after having a total of four hours sleep the night before my 9:25 a.m. flight. Suffice it to say, it was not a good flight. Nonetheless, I made it to class on time, with minimal traffic (someone was looking out for me on that one). Class was good...my friend from orientation was in there, and it's on a topic I pretty much already know all about. I missed my other class due to TX, but I met with the professor and got caught up. This class will definitely be challenging and is already stressing me out. But I've realized that I do have the power and tenacity to get through school. This is good.

In closing, I'm going to go back to the mechanical bull thing (Please see picture above for an example...that is Hercules, the star of westernextremeentertainment.com). I have an addendum. Just so you know, I rode the bull in front of a total of three people. I refused to ride it while a huge crowd watched me. I never quite understood the appeal of the bull. It is sooooo not that fun. For starters, it really hurts. Secondly, it looks stupid. Third, it's a freakin' synthetic hunk of rubber/plastic controlled by men in cowboy hats whose main goal is to throw off the men and ogle the girls bouncing around with their pants pulled down in the back.

So why do people ride it? The answer is simple: They ride it so everyone can look and laugh at them bouncing around with their pants riding low and their arm up in the air like a gaucho. Much like blogs, the bull is all about attention. But know this...I did not ride that bull for attention. I rode it for me, because it was something I was afraid to do (and if I hadn't been half-drunk, I wouldn't have done it). Next time, fake spastic bull, be assured that I won't go near ya. I already had my fun with you. But I'll be happy to watch everyone else embarass themselves in front of the masses.

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