A Job Well Done
Picture it: Last weekend, midday, my dad's hospital room.I'm sitting at the foot of his bed holding a crossword puzzle. I read the clues to my family, trying not to scream the answers out even though I know some of them immediately.
My mom gets one right away. "Good job!" I say enthusiastically.
She finds this hysterical.
It's become somewhat of a habit for me, but one that only comes out with my family. For some reason, I'm always patting them on the back for even the tiniest of accomplishments.
My mom gets a particularly difficult jar open? She gets a "Good job!" from me.
My dad manages to turn the channel from American Idol just in time for LOST to come back from commercial break? He gets a "Good job!" from me.
I suppose it has something to do with me being protective of my parents. Wanting to make them feel good.
So I find it a little odd that I don't take this same approach with myself. One of the things I realized last year during my little pre/post break-up breakdown was that I constantly derided myself.
Make a wrong turn? "Lauren, you idiot," my brain screams at me.
Start to cry? "Shut up, stupid."
Those negative thoughts would run through my head all day. But slowly I learned to change these negative thoughts to positive. So instead of "Lauren, you idiot," I would say to myself "Don't worry, it's no big deal."
I haven't quite gotton used to mentally rewarding myself yet, but maybe the fact that I'm "Good jobbing" everyone around me means that I'm on the right track.
So, in the spirit of loving myself, I will now acknowledge a few of my recent accomplishments, no matter how insignificant they may be:
- Going grocery shopping for my parents (and offering to do so even without being asked) - Good job!
- Refraining from eating the whole lemon merengue pie and instead having just a sliver - Good job!
- Making an appointment to take my car to the dealer (finally) and an appointment to get my hair colored - Good job!
- Taking over something for my boss today at work even though it was somewhat stressful - Good job!
And finally, the best one of all...
- Downing an entire bottle of wine last night, getting totally drunk, missing one of my inane MTV shows that I shouldn't be watching anyway, and not giving a shit about any of it? A JOB WELL DONE, LAUREN!
Sometimes you just need to give yourself a pat on the back.
Sometimes you just need to get drunk.
And sometimes...you've gotta do both.
posted by Sleepy Girl @ 3:45 PM
4 Comments:
Good job! Lol.
But seriously, you sound like me. I'm also my own worst critic and an obsessive perfectionist.
Give yourself a pat on the back for being such a good daughter!
YEAH! Great job, Lauren!
And a round of applause for being such a lovely daughter, I sure hope I'll have kids like you when i'm older ;)
Bottom's up,
-x-Matt
If you pat yourself on the back when you're drunk, do it gently. Otherwise you could knock yourself down. :)
I meant to comment last week but Blogger wouldn't let me :(
I just wanted to say great job to you to Lauren! I totally know what you mean about being able to compliment others and yet constantly putting myself down. We have to remember that every little thing we do is worth celebrating, no matter how imperfect or unspecial they may seem. My therapist used to call that "being a good parent to oneself."
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